Bits and pieces of Christmas cheer for one

Including a visit from Rudolph the Reindeer's elkish cousins

• The elk came back yesterday. I was out walking in my new silver rainsuit that makes me look like something from outer space. When I turned the corner toward home, I saw them, one male with impressive antlers, the others female or too young for horns. I pushed back my hood to show them I was human. They stared, every one of them watching me move past them toward my driveway. I felt a little shiver of nerves. What if they charged me? I’d be one dead space lady. But no, they stared while I babbled at them about how happy I was to see them, even if they were not reindeer and not one of them had a shiny red nose. We watched each other for a long time as the rain dripped on us. When I moved, their heads moved as if they were attached. Eventually, I backed away, grateful for this holiday gift. (The photo is a different elk sighting. I didn’t have my camera this time)

• I got up in the wee hours to beat the crowds shopping at the Newport Fred Meyer store. I was finished with gifts and not planning for company, but I needed food and necessities like light bulbs and sponges. The store was not as crowded as it would be later, but it was busy enough with people shopping in teams. Husbands pushing carts behind their wives. Women pushing full carts while wrangling toddlers. Friends grabbing party food. I had to fight my impatience as they blocked the aisles, consulting. This kind? Do we need more wine? Do we need rolls? What kind? I wanted to scream, “One of you take charge, pick something, and move on!” I do remember how fun it can be tripping through a store with friends, completely unaware of whose path we might be blocking. Alone, I’m a get-it-done kind of girl. Go down the rows with my list, grab what I want, and check out.

My mother used to shop to make Christmas dinner for ten or more people with us two kids tagging along, begging for toys. It was exhausting, and she still had to feed the family three times a day with no help from Dad. I get tired just thinking about it.

One of the advantages of living alone is shopping at my own time and pace and eating whatever I want. I made a potato and cheese omelet for dinner last night. After our four o’clock Christmas Eve Mass, I’m planning to eat a burrito or two with Caesar salad. It’s not traditional, but who’s around to care? Nor is there anyone to question why I needed to buy those pumpkin chocolate chip cookies sitting on my counter.

• My friend Pat and I discovered by text that we were both binge-watching Season Six of “Virgin River” on Netflix on Sunday. Seven hundred miles apart, we watched in tandem. What episode are you on now? Nine. Is this wedding really going to happen? What’s up with Chantell? Let’s talk when we finish Episode 10. And we did. It was like we were not each watching alone from our solo senior homes in different states. Texting is not the same as touching, but it is a way to be together while apart. Do you have a text buddy? Maybe you can find one for the new year.

As for what happens in Season Six, let’s just say every single character has some kind of melodrama. It’s not terribly realistic, but it is entertaining. The season ends with enough cliffhangers to keep us hyperventilating until another season appears late next year.

BTW, some of the characters in that show do live alone, but the town has so many nosy Nellies, they can’t go an hour without somebody dropping in to check on them. For most of us, that does not happen.

• I’m having Christmas dinner with friends who include orphans like me in their family holiday gatherings. I jokingly suggested lasagna as an alternative to the usual turkey, ham or beef. Guess what? We’re having lasagna. Fun!

The waves are wild here on the Oregon coast. We’re having high surf advisories again. It’s expected to rain until after New Year’s Day. But it’s cozy here by the fire, and the neighbor’s psycho rooster is crowing again. I hope you are all safe and warm and feeling peace in your hearts. Don’t let the holidays get you down.

Can we do it alone? Yes, if we look for the bright spots and enjoy doing things our own way.

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Many of us who live alone have never had children, either by choice or circumstance. I write a blog called Childless by Marriage. This week’s post focuses on the challenges of stepparenting during the holidays. Take a look at https://childlessbymarriageblog.com/2024/12/23/holiday-stepparenting-is-not-all-ho-ho-ho.

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How did I end up alone? My first marriage ended in divorce. My second husband died of Alzheimer’s after we had moved to the Oregon coast, far from family. I never had any kids, only dogs. Now I live by myself in a big house in the woods. You can read our story in my memoir, No Way Out of This: Loving a Partner with Alzheimer’s, available now at your favorite bookseller. Visit https://www.suelick.com for information on all of my books.