This is brilliant stuff Sue. Again! I can so relate. I have thought about starting up a friendship group over here in Lincolnshire UK but the last one I started went wotsernames up. And I vowed never again. But, like you, I need to do or try something (all of the groups already in situ contain grannies, mummies et al). This piece has got me thinking. Maybe I should give it a go. If it fails it fails - at least I tried. I love your tales and stories. It makes me feel ‘it’s not just me’. Thank you xxx
Wow! I would never have thought about there being groups based on making friends. I can see that as a result of joining a group that is formed around a special interest like your writing group though. Good ideas for making people reach out and try different activities until they find their special group. I might mention too, that an individual looking for likeminded people might think about volunteering at an agency or group that is based on one of their interests.
Very relatable. And a good reminder that it's possible to create new connections at any age or stage. April will be here before you know it - which leads me to a suggestion. If you end up getting a female dog, April would be a very cute name.
I love that you made a new Friend at the Library Sue! No one said you would need a gaggle of Friends to survive, 1 will do, a really good one.
Before COVID I ran a Women's Wednesdays at my home 10-12+ women would show up weekly at 10 am for a cup of tea, a check in and a small Bible study, which I would prepare. The study was usually based upon something that was happening in many of our 60+ lives. The chat was great and often raucous, and people left anticipating next week's get together.
Connection, with one, several or many is still possible at our age. I also would not call you a loner. Yes you live alone, but you said you have your dogs and you go to a Writer's Club. Seems you do get out there, ya?
I love the thought about "making space for new friendships to happen." It acknowledges that some, if not many, efforts may be dead ends, but if you don't make the effort, nothing will change. I'm a loner as well, preferring to have a few close friends but well aware that at this stage of life, changes in circumstances can come out of the blue. Dear friends have had to move, or became ill, or died. So I've been making a more conscious effort to meet new friends (including younger ones) as well as stay in touch with old ones. I've learned that usually, when I get out of my comfort zone, it pays off in unexpected ways.
Recovery. Almost all the folks in my life today come from that community. I don’t love everybody in recovery, but most of the people I meet we have a strong something in common and that’s a start.
I now understand your reluctance about rushing into getting a pet. I tried to get my dog, who seemed lonely, a kitten a couple of weeks ago and it was a nightmare. My 65 lb. dog thought that the 4 lb. kitten was a tiny assassin and we were all in danger. After 4 days of nonstop barking, ALL of our stress levels were through the roof and I decided that we all deserved better. Luckily, someone else adopter her right away. It was an expensive, painful lesson learned. I admire your thoughtfulness and consideration in waiting to adopt a dog.
After reading some of your posts and Dr. Ruth's recent book The Joy of Connections, I went on FB and joined a Women over 50s Friend group. After a few weeks, I found someone who lives right down the road from me. She is having a few women over on a day in March and invited me to come. I admit that I am a little nervous. What if I don't click with anyone there? I am going to put myself out there though. Wish me luck!
Tammy, I'm sorry the cat didn't work out. That's hard. Congrats on joining the friend group. Have fun at the gathering in March. Even if you don't find a new best friend, at least you'll be among people, and there will probably be some good food. Lots of luck.
This is brilliant stuff Sue. Again! I can so relate. I have thought about starting up a friendship group over here in Lincolnshire UK but the last one I started went wotsernames up. And I vowed never again. But, like you, I need to do or try something (all of the groups already in situ contain grannies, mummies et al). This piece has got me thinking. Maybe I should give it a go. If it fails it fails - at least I tried. I love your tales and stories. It makes me feel ‘it’s not just me’. Thank you xxx
Wow! I would never have thought about there being groups based on making friends. I can see that as a result of joining a group that is formed around a special interest like your writing group though. Good ideas for making people reach out and try different activities until they find their special group. I might mention too, that an individual looking for likeminded people might think about volunteering at an agency or group that is based on one of their interests.
Very relatable. And a good reminder that it's possible to create new connections at any age or stage. April will be here before you know it - which leads me to a suggestion. If you end up getting a female dog, April would be a very cute name.
I love that you made a new Friend at the Library Sue! No one said you would need a gaggle of Friends to survive, 1 will do, a really good one.
Before COVID I ran a Women's Wednesdays at my home 10-12+ women would show up weekly at 10 am for a cup of tea, a check in and a small Bible study, which I would prepare. The study was usually based upon something that was happening in many of our 60+ lives. The chat was great and often raucous, and people left anticipating next week's get together.
Connection, with one, several or many is still possible at our age. I also would not call you a loner. Yes you live alone, but you said you have your dogs and you go to a Writer's Club. Seems you do get out there, ya?
I love the thought about "making space for new friendships to happen." It acknowledges that some, if not many, efforts may be dead ends, but if you don't make the effort, nothing will change. I'm a loner as well, preferring to have a few close friends but well aware that at this stage of life, changes in circumstances can come out of the blue. Dear friends have had to move, or became ill, or died. So I've been making a more conscious effort to meet new friends (including younger ones) as well as stay in touch with old ones. I've learned that usually, when I get out of my comfort zone, it pays off in unexpected ways.
Sue, I always enjoy your writing. Thank you. Another great piece.
Recovery. Almost all the folks in my life today come from that community. I don’t love everybody in recovery, but most of the people I meet we have a strong something in common and that’s a start.
I now understand your reluctance about rushing into getting a pet. I tried to get my dog, who seemed lonely, a kitten a couple of weeks ago and it was a nightmare. My 65 lb. dog thought that the 4 lb. kitten was a tiny assassin and we were all in danger. After 4 days of nonstop barking, ALL of our stress levels were through the roof and I decided that we all deserved better. Luckily, someone else adopter her right away. It was an expensive, painful lesson learned. I admire your thoughtfulness and consideration in waiting to adopt a dog.
After reading some of your posts and Dr. Ruth's recent book The Joy of Connections, I went on FB and joined a Women over 50s Friend group. After a few weeks, I found someone who lives right down the road from me. She is having a few women over on a day in March and invited me to come. I admit that I am a little nervous. What if I don't click with anyone there? I am going to put myself out there though. Wish me luck!
Tammy, I'm sorry the cat didn't work out. That's hard. Congrats on joining the friend group. Have fun at the gathering in March. Even if you don't find a new best friend, at least you'll be among people, and there will probably be some good food. Lots of luck.